Meeting and me.... (A Story)

Some day that I don't remember the date of… It was around 11 in the morning, just an ordinary day of rush and chaos for many but my heart was getting ready, ready to be strong, ready to beat properly and look good. It was difficult for me and I knew it.

After 4 years I was going to meet him…


A little glance at the background story just for your better understanding.

Ours was a coed which used to follow strict rules of unmingling of girls and boys. So we are the offspring of a society where speaking with different genders was alien to us. So the formation of a new bond germination of lovely feelings shayad shahzada Salim ke liye bhi hamse aasan tha. Ijhar to kr paya that Anarkali se. Humari situation me to kabhi ijhar nhi hua, jisko kbhi samajha bhi nhi gaya ki Kya sachme aisa kuchh tha?...


You know We only used to look at each other at every possible occasion we got. And as I remember there were many. One special case that I remember is.... It was after the 3rd preboard of 12 class and as it had been since the last two pre boards that my score was low again. Just after meeting our physics teacher and getting heavenly insights for improvement I was back in class. There is no need to explain my situation as many of us are through this. It's a board exam, turning point of career, expectations of parents teachers and cherry on the top your own expectations from yourself. Kuchh ki first day se padhai karke aur hum jaise kuchh ki chand mahino me karke. And I was on the verge of crying… completely devastated, subsumed in that most glorified feeling of guilt ki Mera to kuchh nahi hoga, score nhi Aya to Kya karungi, jaise jindagi sath chhodane vali ho… Kya kare tab hum Bache hua karte the. And with all this in mind unconsciously honestly, truthfully, unconsciously I looked at him. I knew he was staring at me for long with optimal care that no other guy will catch him. And his eyes had a question and a soothing answer too in them. Hey!.. what's wrong with you? And the answer to it… I know it's only going to be fine with you….. And trust me, even if somebody had told me that day that I was going to die the next morning his gaze was enough to make me feel as if I have already lived millions… And of course har us Hindi film ki nayika ki tarah mere chehre pe bhi hamare janab ki vajah se mayus hansi chha gyi… and I remember the only conversation the only conversation in seven years of school life we had(because of being members of mingling prohibited society) was only for once and which was only a sentence long… It was on Teacher's Day. Being seniors we were wearing sarees and all. So I was  passing him on the school porch and he caught my attention saying Prajakta madam!. Aap aaj achi lag rahi ho….. and trust me I had gathered all the "rudeness" in the world, I did not even reply to him and rushed ahead….


And then God knows for how many days I was trying to count the number of pieces that his heart must have broken into after that event…..


After leaving school, no call, no message, I know nothing about what he did after school, his status whether he is single or ?... and suddenly today I am meeting him…


And the reason for me getting ready is that there is no assurance if the person I am meeting today is the same or different in either way good or bad….


But I am ready today… Ready for a conversation longer than a sentence. Yes I am ready.



____ Prajakta Prakash

          July 2019

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